Friday Night Smackdown Review #17 (4/24/2020) by Anthony S. DiSalvatore
Hello everybody, and welcome back to my weekly Smackdown review! The highlight of this show over the last several weeks has been Daniel Bryan vs. Cesaro, but tonight, the hook is completely different. That’s right, this week marks the 25th anniversary of Triple H in WWE! There have been some rumors as to what may happen when Triple H shows up tonight, but enough of that. I’m just here to talk about the show. Triple H is gonna kill it for sure!
The show opens with the New Day. I’m not sure I want to watch this anymore unless Triple H is gonna come out and attack them both with a sledgehammer. They spend a few minutes putting themselves over until the Lucha House Party interrupts. They don’t get far before my guys Miz and Johnny show up and walk right through their shot! Miz and Johnny are here to hit the New Day with some knowledge. Their title win last week was totally illegitimate because they never beat Miz and Johnny in a tag team match. Get em Miz! BUT WAIT! The Forgotten Sons are here to introduce themselves. Something about serving their country and being forgotten when they got back. That’s their gimmick? They’re especially mad at Miz for playing a Marine in the movies. This results in a big brawl. The Forgotten Sons get the best of New Day while Miz and Johnny escape.
Match #1: Drew Gulak (w. Daniel Bryan) vs. Baron Corbin
This should be an interesting match. Gulak may be small, but he has a lot of heart and technical ability. Not to mention Corbin’s biggest weakness is the classic rollup. Will Elias get involved in this match? Probably. This rivalry just won’t die! We’re informed by the announcers that after last week’s attack, Elias has been rendered unable to sing or play the guitar. What a shame! It’s no surprise that Corbin can easily overpower Gulak, which he’s doing at the beginning of this match. But it’s a marathon Corbin, not a sprint!
Things are not looking so good for Gulak in this match for now, but Daniel Bryan’s doing the best he can to motivate his friend. Speaking of friends, what happened to Dolph Ziggler and Bobby Roode? Weren’t they running with Corbin for a while? Corbin has Gulak cornered, but perhaps out of frustration, Gulak fights his way out. Just when it looks like Gulak’s about to win, Cesaro and Nakamura show up and attack Daniel Bryan! Oh look, more flunkies for Corbin! I guess this is all they can do, without Sami Zayn they’d just be running around a parking lot confused. Corbin wins with the End of Days. He’s in the Money in the Bank match!
Match #2: Sheamus vs. Daniel Vidot
I don’t know who this other guy is, but apparently, he’s an Australian rugby player. Sheamus is out here now and you better not even try to play a Jeff Hardy tribute this time. He clubs this dude like a baby seal and wins with a Brogue Kick. They wait for Sheamus to leave this time before playing the Jeff Hardy tribute video. That was smart, but you better not let Sheamus see that you’re playing it. He’s gonna beat up Michael Cole next time I know it!
Match #3: Miz & Johnny vs. Lucha House Party
Before this match started, Sheamus showed back up and he looks pissed as usual. He’s mad about the Jeff Hardy thing and this time he breaks Michael Cole’s headset. That’s your last warning! The Luchas are getting owned in this match. I’m surprised they’re still around, I thought they got fired! Anyway, it’s all Miz and Johnny here. Miz goes for the Skull Crushing Finale and it’s over. Kalisto beat Miz with a VICTORY ROLL? WHAT?!
Match #4: Sasha Banks (w. Bayley) vs. Lacey Evans
Too bad this isn’t another promo! I’ve been skipping Sasha and Bayley for the last couple of weeks. They’ve just gotten repetitive. I STILL don’t understand why they don’t just let Lacey be GI Jane. She’s a lot more natural that way. Still can’t promo at all, but at least then she wouldn’t dress like a grandma from the Great Depression. Lacey goes for a punch on the outside, but she misses and hits the ring post. That must have hurt! Banks continues to work the hand of Lacey, but she still can’t get the pin, so she goes for a submission and that doesn’t work either. Sasha goes for a pin and has Lacy pins for about five, but Bayley inadvertently distracts the ref. Sasha gets pissed and yells at Bayley, then she gets fisted by Lacey. BOOM! Game over. Tamina shows up and lays out Bayley on the stage with a superkick. Whatever!
Match #5 Alexa Bliss & Nikki Cross vs. Carmella & Dana Brooke
First Miz and Johnny lose again, then Lacy fists someone, and now another pointless woman’s tag team title match. This title should just be done away with at this point. Even the female wrestling fans don’t care about this title anymore! I’ll be honest, I spaced out during this match. When I came to, Bliss was trying to come off the top rope, but Carmella stopped it from happening. Bliss and Cross win with a new tag team finish. Whatever!
Main Event: Triple H Shows Up!
HERE WE GO! This is what I’ve been waiting for! Triple H comes to the ring, but he doesn’t get to say much before Shawn Michaels shows up and makes it all about himself as usual! These guys have some funny banter. The two words this time are social distancing. This is funny, but I’d still rather see Triple H by himself. Michaels is looking rough these days. Triple H could destroy him! We’re directed to the big screen so we can some old outtakes of DX making dick jokes. I thought this was supposed to be Triple H’s thing. Why is Michaels involved? Next, we see a highlight reel of Triple H’s Wrestlemania appearances. I use that term loosely, it’s a bunch of losses. Where’s this going?!
Michaels is joking around and Triple H gets interrupted by a phone call from Stephanie. Oh god! Stephanie’s pissed off at Michaels for making jokes at her expense. Next up is a phone call from Flair. He knows how to work Skype? Wow. Everybody else in the world does except for me. Somebody else calls in, I think it’s Road Dogg but I can’t tell. That beard is outrageous. BUT WAIT! Vince McMahon shows up in the arena! WOW! He doesn’t come on much anymore. Vince is all over the place here. He tells us about the Gobbledy Gooker and Undertaker’s debut at Survivor Series 1990. They talk about that segment with Triple H in the casket with a mannequin. Vince compares it to the Bayley, This Is Your Life segment. BURN! Has this become a Dean Martin celebrity roast?! Vince shuts off the lights and this show is over!
My Final Thoughts on Smackdown (4/24/2020)
I was going to say something rude about all the women’s matches on this show, but I can’t because Vince has me in stitches! I CAN’T EVEN. See you next week!