An Overly Detailed WWE Smackdown Review (2/7/20) By An Overly Opinionated Fan
Friday Night Smackdown Review #6 (2/7/2020) by Anthony S. DiSalvatore
Well ladies and gentlemen, here we are again this week with another review of Smackdown. If you’ve been following for the last month, you know it’s been especially rough. But tonight, there is cause for excitement! Goldberg will be on for some reason! Also, I’m excited to see the next chapter between Daniel Bryan and The Fiend. If you like Reigns vs. Corbin, I’m sure there’ll be more of that. Let’s get right into it! Tonight, we’ll see a ladies’ fatal four-way match to determine the next challenger for Bayley’s title. Daniel Bryan will be here to address what happened at the Royal Rumble!
The show opens with my close personal friend, The Miz, and his tag team partner John Morrison making their way out for a live rendition of The Dirt Sheet! This may be the segment of the show for me. They open with a hype package for their upcoming title match against the New Day in Saudi Arabia. This is done in the style of a movie preview! Cameos include Lance Storm, Miz’s dad, and John Laurinaitis! Here comes New Day, complete with Big E eating popcorn. Big E is a ball of energy and charisma. Kofi can take or leave at this point. Just as it looks like they’re about to throw down, the Usos interrupt and steal New Day’s high-pitched who thing. Miz and Morrison have never beat them! Dolph Ziggler and Robert Roode show up next, but before they can come out, Miz and Morrison hit New Day from behind. This leads us to our first match of the night!
Match #1: Robert Roode & Dolph Ziggler vs. Usos
We come back from commercial to find this match already in progress. Dolph and Robert are in control. Roode is back to wearing short trunks. Roode and Ziggler are using a bunch of old school heel tactics to stay on top in this one. Dolph goes back to preening to the crowd as he does, and it costs him the upper hand in the ring until Robert Roode pushes one of the Usos off the top rope to the floor. He took a nasty spill on that one. We come back from another break and Robert Roode is firmly in control, stomping the Uso in the corner. He tags to Dolph, who can’t get it done on his own and has to tag out almost immediately. Roode takes a tumble out of the ring and makes it back in relatively quickly, but he can’t stop the hot tag between the Usos. Roode weathers the storm and goes for his DDT, but comes up empty and gets dumped. Ziggler comes in and gets the jump on Uso from behind, but he can’t get the pin. One of the Usos ends up going for the Uso splash, but Dolph blocks it with his knees. He ends up going outside the ring, and Roode gets double teamed. Uso Splash for the win. This wasn’t a bad match, but I know what to expect from the Usos, and I’m not a fan of them in the ring. I like their gimmick and their promos, but the superkicks are getting on my nerves. Next!
We come back to find Alexa Bliss getting ready for her match backstage. Nikki Cross is there and says something I couldn’t hear. Bliss essentially tells her not to worry. When you’re a former multi-time ladies champion, you know how to handle yourself in the ring. Flashback to last week when Roman Reigns and the Usos poured a pot of dog food over Corbin’s head. No joke, I called the dog food match almost a month before it actually happened, but I was kidding. I still can’t believe they went through with it.
Baron Corbin shows up, still wearing his ridiculous crown, and he punks out the guy in the production truck for playing the aforementioned video segment. Up next, we have Elias. He’s in the ring playing guitar. This guy could be a real star if they’d actually put him a match. He’s jacked and knows his way around a promo, plus he has a sweet elbow drop. Cesaro and Sami Zayn interrupt his song, without Nakamura for some reason. Sami Zayn is killing it, as usual. We have our next match!
Match #2: Cesaro (w. Sami Zayn) vs. Elias
I’ll be honest, I’ve given up on Cesaro at this point. I’ve grown to accept that he will never be a World Champion because he lacks the inherent charisma that was there with other champions. I like him in his current spot with Sami though. Nakamura is conspicuous by his absence here, I can’t help but think he’ll get involved in this somehow.
Both guys are bringing it in the early going, I really like Elias’s aggressiveness in this one. Elias ends up getting knocked to the outside. Sami Zayn is jumping around out there as only he can. Cesaro applies the dreaded rear chinlock, followed by a backdrop and a gutwrench suplex. It’s all Cesaro right now! Elias is trying to catch his breath and Sami Zayn blindsides him while the ref’s back is turned. BRILLIANT! Elias fires up and delivers the running knee to the face, but he only gets two, so he goes for the diving elbow drop. Cesaro’s been around for a while, so that doesn’t work on him. He knocks Elias off the top rope, then does his suplex to the inside of the ring. I love that move! Cesaro gets all of the slingshot uppercut, but Elias kicks out at two. Cesaro’s had enough of this and unloads with a succession of uppercuts. Elias hits him a left-handed clothesline and goes to the top rope once again for the elbow drop! He nailed it and that’s all she wrote. This was a pretty decent match, maybe it went too long, but both of these guys killed it. Good on Elias finally winning a match for a change. We go backstage to see GOLDBERG getting ready to make some kind of special announcement!
Baron Corbin interrupts AGAIN to remind everybody and their brother that yes, he is the current King of the Ring. He brings up the Super Bowl. He’s from Kansas City so he’s a big Chiefs fan. They beat the 49ers. Them and the refs, but that’s none of my business. He’s still crying about the Royal Rumble! He wants one more match with Roman Reigns. Haven’t they fought enough lately? He’s staging a sit-in until he gets his match against Roman. This show’s about to come to an ass grinding halt. Roman thankfully saves us from this, by beating up Corbin once again. He’ll just never learn. Roman accepts Corbin’s challenge, but it won’t just be any match, it’ll be in a steel cage!
Next up is Goldberg via satellite! Normally, he’d challenge Brock Lesnar for a title match like he always does. But as we know, Brock is busy. Goldberg is sad but still determined to fight for a title. He challenges The Fiend for the Universal title! Bray Wyatt hijacks Goldberg’s interview with his very own news break! It’ll be cold day in hell before Goldberg beats The Fiend for the title. His words, not mine. Daniel Bryan is backstage next, and who should show up but Heath Slater? It’s been forever since I’ve seen him! He’s the One Man Band baby! And he’s here to give Daniel Bryan some friendly advice about his business with the Fiend, but Bryan is NOT hearing it right now. He challenges Heath Slater to a match later on!
Match #3: Daniel Bryan vs. Heath Slater
Great to see Slater again! Bryan made this challenge to prove a point to Heath, but Bryan better watch himself. Heath beat Chris Jericho once! Bryan throws Slater outside the ring almost immediately and hits the suicide dive. I hate that move. Missile dropkick by Bryan, followed by the Yes Kicks. Knee to the face and Bryan won’t go for the pin. He repeatedly stomps Heath’s face and goes for the LeBell Lock. Bryan wins, more by referee stoppage than actual submission. I guess that’s what Heath gets for trying to give some friendly advice. He thinks he’s a part of Nexus right now.
Up next is the new Intercontinental champ, Braun Strowman! He’s very happy to be Intercontinental champion. The crowd is hot for him, and he gives them all a quick rundown of his career accomplishments, including THAT tag team title reign. Sami Zayn is out here once again, this time with Nakamura. Nakamura wants a rematch. Braun says he’ll take him on right now, but Sami says now’s not the time. Did I miss something? Didn’t he just make the challenge right now? The Revival attack Braun from behind at the knees, and now Nakamura comes in and gets a piece. This doesn’t last long before Braun wrecks them all and Sami Zayn is there all by himself. Sami runs for his life and Nakamura makes the interception with a knee to the face. That was a close one! Are the Revival with Sami Zayn now? That could work out nicely. I’m interested to see where this goes for sure.
And now, for something completely different. Otis has a date with Mandy Rose coming up, and he’s chosen to get ready for it the old-fashioned way: with an 80s era Rocky Balboa style workout montage! I guess Tucker is playing the role of Mickey.
Match #4: Sheamus vs. Apollo Crews
Wow, Heath Slater and Apollo Crews making cameos on the same show! Brogue Kick and it’s all over but the crying. Boom baby! Sheamus looks to add injury to insult but Chad Gable interrupts. This doesn’t last long before Sheamus destroys him with another Brogue Kick. Keep the change!
Main Event: Alexa Bliss vs. Carmella vs. Dana Brooke vs. Naomi
The winner of this match gets to fight Bayley for her ladies’ title. They just happen to be in San Jose, which is Bayley’s hometown. She’s at ringside too, so they’d all be smart to take her as an immediate threat. She went off the deep end a while back and she’s never been the same since. So if you’ve been following me since I started here, I’ve never been a fan of multiple person matches, because there’s so much going on it’s hard to tell a decent story. Needless to say, I’m not a fan of a four-way ladies match. There are no disqualifications, so Bayley and Naomi get into it at ringside. This crowd is cheering Bayley because of course, they are. Naomi slingshots into the ring and takes out Bliss and Carmella. Dana Brooke gives a sweet powerbomb to Bliss! I love a well-executed powerbomb! Naomi nails the flippity flop, but as you might expect, none of these moves are enough to get the win. Basic formula for all multiple person matches we’ve seen lately. Two people are in the ring doing moves to each other, neither one can get the upper hand for more than a few seconds. Everyone else waits outside the ring. Bayley seems most afraid of Naomi, who gives Alexa Bliss the Butt Slam and goes for the win! But she gets two, because Carmella superkicks her, not once but twice. Carmella gets the win and she’s the new top contender for the ladies’ title. Kind of a disappointing finish.
My Final Thoughts on Smackdown (2/7/2020)
I was impressed to see the fire in Daniel Bryan! Heath Slater STILL doesn’t know where he is after that. Is he done with the Fiend? If so, where does he go from here? Speaking of the Fiend, I’m super interested to see what he does with Goldberg. Neither of these guys are known as ring generals, and Goldberg has beaten Brock Lesnar with ease recently, so he could be the one to but the Fiend down! I bet Nakamura will beat Strowman in his rematch. Strowman’s never had much luck in title matches. Speaking of no luck, how did Naomi not win that women’s match? She’d make the best challenger. It’s been forever since we’ve seen her, she has a ton of charisma, and even Bayley’s home crowd was getting hot for her towards the end of that thing. Seems like a bait and switch to have Carmella win at the last second. What’s next for Smackdown? Tune in next week to find out!